my random musings, now in words.

Cried in the shower.

Let’s just, lets just take a moment and listen.

Still learning music myself, I’ve heard (and sampled) various kinds of beautiful ballad songs. Still, this particular song touches my heart immensely. I am pretty darn emotional since Monday you know. It’s been too much for me, this week. I think I’ve said the same thing to myself now and then, but you know, this week is TMTH, the different kind. There’s just too much emotions, all the frustration,  the rage, the angst etc all rolled up within a short 72hours of my life. It is insane (or so I think). But yep, somehow or rather, I’m still sane, trying to control myself (because nobody says pushing back your emotions is easy). You see, I don’t really technically write about my personal life here, but The Brother is really sick and he’s in the hospital since two days back. So I was like, crying all day, really sad. I can’t concentrate on my tutorials, let alone the massive amount of stuff that I need to read. So I thought I might just be honest with you and tell what’s going on. The Brother is suffering from this disease that I can disclose here, and I am scared for him.  The Mother told me late last evening, that he is really sick and might undergo an operation and it was a definite wtf moment for me. And literally my mind starts to race to a million directions. I was busy trying to figure out what strict liability is in criminal law, but as I received that message from The Mother, I just want to be beside my brother a stays there. It is surreal how love can actually translates, see. The Brother and I never talk much. Obvz there’s no beef between us, maybe its just one of those awkward teenage phases we are going through. But all I know is that he is my only brother and I do not want to lose him you know. But I am stuck here, writing to you this as I can’t go back to my hometown and visit him. I can’t imagine my baby brother being poked with all sorts of needles and all those creepy blood things. I did not even ask The Mother whether he is unconscious or not.  That idea is just too scary for me to think about. I really don’t want that to happen. It is amazing, and I am shocked myself to know that I start to worry about him. I guess I do love him. For real, this time.


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This entry was posted on September 30, 2010 by in MY CONCERNS.

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