my random musings, now in words.

HOLD ON…is OCTOBER actually coming to an END??

Within a week, I will no longer profess myself as an eighteen year old .M. Sometime next week, I’ll be the .M., aged NINETEEN. nineteen as in 19, no?

DSC00084~super random, early 2008, Penang~

The feeling is surreal, i guess. To come and think of it, I can’t imagine I am almost nineteen. I mean, really? How did I spend my last eighteen years in this world? How come time flies so fast? Eh, no, lemme rephrase that. How come time flies too fast? Because  I really believe birthdays should be treated as a rebirth of yourself, I guess it is only appropriate for me to re-think what have I done during these past years. What have i done during those years that i wished not to do in the near future and what things i should take note, so that i can somewhat improve as time flies.

I notice that I’ve changed a lil’ bit since I left high school.

For once;

1) I am not so interested in reading the normal chic lits no more. Can i say i am more into the dramatic, real life kind of novels? I think so. Currently reading: My Best Friend’s Girl by Dorothy Koomson ( eh chic lit kah ini?)

2) In a twisted way I now feel the pressure of being the first child of the family, and I can now no longer count on them with things, as now they are counting on me on whatever I do.

3) I finally understand why I need to step up to the game and ace this degree. I really need good money in the future, because that’s the only thing that makes life work.

4) I learn how to prioritise. Like how i need to write down this entry then read up my Tort cases.heh.

5) I am more um maternal? I mean, i am still a bit allergic to kids/babies/toddlers, but you know, I want things to be in the right place, I want people to keep their manners, I tend to make my roommates clean up their stuff for the sake of cleanliness etc. or was it um bossy? Right. Bossy it is.

There are, of course, some other things that I myself could not be able to trace because of my ignorance that i posses, (like the other day when i asked to one of my friend what does she/he think about me, and he/she (surprisingly) say that they found me ‘cold’. Thanks guys.)

Okay am i just turning 9teen biologically, but mentally a 68 year old, and with the physicality of a 84 year old?

Am i?

I am, no?



i am thinking of a something that i can do for myself, to mark the last day of me being 8teen. like when i freshly turned 8teen last year, i bought myself a piece of vintage jewelry that i sort of wearing it religiously from day one. I know my parents will ask me what i wanted for my bday and all, but this is different. Its a personal thing for me, so i gotta think um, wisely. Is that the word? Hmm, yes.


and have some cake. lots of cake. get sugar high and keep on sloshing acrylic on the plain canvas.

have  more cake, and buy myself an Eiffel Tower charm, maybe?

Yes Eiffel Tower charm. That’s it.

xx, .M.


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This entry was posted on October 21, 2009 by in MY CONCERNS.

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